20250604

[3] Dog Days

 One :

Larry was most certainly a dog not so much as a determined animal searching for love.

He was not owned or employed, his duty was to love and hope it may be returned in kind.

The scent of his paws on my shoulders displayed submission understanding and strenght.

This dog knew his power and the power of love.

It was unknown territory upon which I wandered scattering dust with my walking boots.

A snake would often threaten me, a wiggling venomous worm of no stature.

A dog would embrace me as best he could with his hands around me, he did not slither.

He survived with sleep and happy dreams and knowing that when he awoke - I would be there.

I was comforted by this dog of fur and wolf and his memories or nuture and safety.

He was a master of survival and he had no fear.

In one day he would sleep for seven, each awakening revealing his faith in me.

We slept together, he curled at the bed foot pressing his body on me to absorb my warmth.

So much taller than me once on his hind legs and so passive and acceptive of grace.

He carried no fear, he had no concept of time. Every day passed and he snouted.

Presenting himself in mornings with soil stuck on his nose, yearning at me for attention.

So proud of his efforts nuzzling the bones I gave that he would save them in earth.

I was not dog, I could not sleep I could not forget, I had no influence to undo happenings.

My sleep became infused with memories  but only one of his seven.

He had no knowledge of human knowledge, his genes were sufficient enabling to survive.

Should I sleep so often I would learn more, should I sleep so often my life would be short.

Two : 

Before granma's house we lived in a garage, a room quadruple car in size and offering shelter.

Watching the house expand like a wooden cobweb further up the slope almost near the top of land.

I was oblivious to days and nights that were heralded by my dip in the tin tub full of carefully controlled hot and warm buckets of water bathing my little body.

Granma showed little restraint and would pluck me from the tub wrapping me in towels to stop me shaking like a dog.

Carrying me outside I made every effort to dampen her dress completely.

Strung by a rope tied to two trees she pegged me by my ankles until I was drip dry.

If I dried well I was clothed and fed, if I did not I would awake damp.

The garage heralded the approach to the house, it sat on level land at the base of the driveway.

It was on the only flat ground but seemed to be a slice of heaven to me.

The clothesline hung for twenty meandering yards above a tiny path fringed with moss too beautiful.

There was peace in the air and I was in no hurry to grow up - all I saw was routine.

How many tracks I walked and did not remember was significant, my little dusty boots scuffed the surface and added to the worn trough of progress.

My steps up the mountain towering above this haven proved insignificant, too many paths, too many distractions, too many lonely homes and gardens littered with neglect as I shuffled by.

There was nothing significant to me other than authority. I could do whatever I wished as long as I adhered to rules.

If there were rules I wondered who administered them and how they would punish me if I did not adhere to conformity.

Solace was found at the foot of the driveway and the fringe of risen land upon the garaged perched.

When it rained a trickle became a stream and a stream became a river and a river became a torrent. 

Three :

Let loose from adult command I wandered and wondered, encountered and surmised about me.

Larry would often leap at me resting his paws on my shoulder, giving me his pleasure of his dog life.

As tall as me on his hind paws wagging his tail in the dust he had little knowledge of his mortality.

Just a dog considered by me as an accessory to my placidity confirming my presence.

When he leaped at me, profounding love and misunderstanding was insignifiacant, I was only small.

He would watch me moving the earth because he could not dig like I could.

The tin shed perched on the high spot of the lowest land and the creek gathered itself around me.

If I be wading knee deep in flowing waters, damming the flow, diverting torment, I was happy.

As content as a dog and as incompetant as a tadpole I dammed the creek to control its flow.

Waist high in the pond I created diversions, walls of mud directing the flow, pools of placidity.

Tadpoles were a plaything that might not survive. Those that did struggled hard.

I never saw a tadpole with a label of 'I am the one'. I felt sorry for all those who never made the grade.

I considered the numerical significance of their being in a pond for me to play with.

I needed to change things.

School was only pacing, not encouraging. Crystalizing sandwhiches and chalk dust and no one willing to be my friend.

When grades were assigned I became only a statistic representing a mediorce adherance to learning.

Other kids had parents but they were singular without a thousand siblings.

I never had parents, I did not know how significant I might be.

Larry came to me, tadpoles welcomed my nurture in their pond, I could pile all I wished.

But I could not be neccesary. Of the thousands of tadpoles not many would live.

It seemed the same for me.

I had no wings attached, I was not bouyant but only weighed with a burden I failed to understand.

Carried by wings not feet that would never cover my steps.

My most  sincere statemant was refusing to eat and wait for anything to happen.

And I wandered.

Dog paws on my shoulders, tadpoles in pools of placidity, comfort with cuudles.

Snuggling into breasts hanging free for me to nuzzle their prominance and heat.

I learnt early that they offered their skin not their soul; that could not be disclosed.

Four :

Chicks in a pen full of scuff and droppings and yet they know how to avoid crap. Their legs are spindly their beaks forage and nod.

Lucky for them that their arse is so removed from their brain.

When I shit it is my bum that squeezes turds curved at their ends so as my clakker will not slam shut.

The noise I hear must be the punch of my door forcing itself closed around my dreams..

 If my sun will be still loving you it will still cast a shadow you may not savour.

At this age I already had no answer.

Life was to big and maybe I should not dare to question.

If I should not state as I exist - only a part of the soup of people tainted with the spice of life.

My spice of life seemed to be delivered in sandwiches I was unable to assemble.

Vary as I may, time tells - it does not mentor, it obstructs my progress.

Wallowing in my pond I was happy wiggling my tail and watched tadpoles wiggling theirs.

They could not be happy but only one of their thousands could expect relief but he was of little mind.

Struggling forwards from her womb attached by a cord to my prison and now presented for observation and a slap on the arse, I was now here and it had not been a pleasant journey.


TBC




 


 

 

 

 

 

 






 


 


 

 

 


20250527

[2] Collective Strangedarity

 One :

The strangers wandered over the unfenced boundary comfortable in the knowledge that one distant day when the elders died they would be heirs.

They wore no labels or name tags highlighting their authority but carried significance airs.

I was not significant, my crystallized sandwiches saved me and I began experimenting.

Rice bubbles with sugar, weetbix with butter, vegemite and jam, and I savoured the taste of last nights meal between my teeth.

I could sustain hunger by sucking my teeth and gums, it was eternal nourishment as long as I never ventured within my cavities.

Why should I worry, apparently I would grow up, get bigger and learn stuff whilst my teeth fell out three times.

There was much time to grow, decay and grow again.

Things were before me and I had the world at my fingertips but I could not feel.

There was no memory of how I arrived here, there was nothing more of feeling passed from hand to hand other than me struggling within a daymare.

There was no food of substance, it was a meagre existance metered at intervals to tame me. I only ate it because I could when it was dispersed to me as a mouse in a cell would.

Things were before me and I had the world at my fingertips but I could not feel. 

A rope tied me and I felt wound and bound, manouvered and manipulated, entranced and mesmerised.

Tethered by authority of puppet people, cluttered within lost souls gathering their overcoats

A rope of hope fed me not as an umbical cord to a cunt but as wings of desperation flapping aimlessly.

I had no idea of anything hidden within trousers or skirts - I wore shorts that dangled about my skinny legs and refused to remain upright about my waist. 

Who were these parents who entered my yard, who were these people who wore shoes that were in one piece and pranced with an authority of gods.

I remember no baptism nor childhood nor pleasure nor pain nor innocence nor a cuddle nor a hug.

What was this thing that drove them all as passengers in a car that had no steering wheel and no one qualified to navigate.

They were all so proud to be. And they were being. 

But the only qualifications neccessary were an ability to were long pants and collect me from things.

There was no school for grown ups they were ensconsed within roles of responsibility.

 I had no ground stable enough to stand upon, I was a child awaiting the discretion of adults.

It was time for my wings to be clipped.

Two : 

I had not applied significance of my little stature to the event, I was worn with dusty steps and slithering reptiles and monitors who patrolled my attendance in crystallized corridors.

The winding tracks chanelled between trees seemed to be able to guide me as I walked towards a destination that never appeared. 

Tempting the world I foraged forward not as a rodent but as a mouse.

Things happened in my awareness and I was placid and succumbed by the comfort of the teet.

I would go with this feeling, there was no world outside me and I cuddled every morsel of comfort.

Having no teeth of soul I could not understand why I should be any less than they.

But I waited and watched my future fade away.

How could I control this descent into another waste basket that I never bought and seemed to determine my excretions that were never collected in my diary.

But I do remember this as an exasperating journey bonded by rules that were neither rectificantane or surmised as an idolation.

There must be a god,  something bigger than this corridor in which I was set to travel but I have no purpose other than to wander and obey the rules.

It occured so steathily no one noticed and there were not many left to care, their lives were unravelling.

No longer would I trek hardened dirt paths uphill and downhill hoping to see any human life.

Life was here before I had a choice.

It presented, it overpowered, it enveloped, it clustered and drowned, it signified why I was.

And so it was that I was deemed only of significance as long as I was insignificant.

But there was a master joy that I relished. I was a child set loose in an adult world.

There had been a lifetime of eight years adrift in safety and complacency and identity.

The strangers purposely wandering with disrespectful aplomb were my parents.




 


 

 




20250511

[1] 1962 - The Bushfire

 

 

 One :

That morning in 1962 the bushfire swept up the hill and fed on the other side in its sweep to consume my grandmothers house.

I awoke to hear not the birds or the rustling of nature but a silence intruding like a vaccuum sucking everything and anything in its way.

But there was a crackling and a smell of no air and a wisp of doubt in my mind.

There was no wake up call at the door from grandma and no rattling plates and pans promising a bush breakfast in a brick house at the top of seven acres of cleared bush dropping to creek that gouged its way down the hill and formed a damn in summer.

I appeared on her front porch little dressed and distressed that the homely charm was threatened.

And there she was, frumpy in a cuddly domestic way, in her morning dress swirling about her running uphill from where I paused and considered the delightfull essence of panic.

She is running uphill carrying two buckets of water slossing at their brim to throw the remainder at the fringe of licking flames crackling through the undergrowth and oblivious to the sooty grey cloud insidiously enveloping the mountain.

Never before had I known fire, I had not seen even a lit match other than the friction between my parents.

But I was struck and was motionless watching my grandma resist the flames that would consume her life and leave me amazed at my small six years of age that her swirling skirt and dogged determination would beat the heat and the crackling and the smell and the lack of air as fire lapped at the boundary of her significance.

I was small and adults were larger and could do things that I could not but grandma was hanging a dress from her hips as though she were encouraging danger as she rushed from burning patch to smouldering soil pouring water whilst slapping licks of fire from her waving frock.

The more she ran the faster her skirt furled and the more her mind unravelled like the curling twigs and bugs and leaves that peppered her life.

I contributed only two pails of water ansd then realised that were some things that must be bigger and stronger than me and just not worth fighting.

The harder she tried the more insignicant she became, her loss of energy from fighting the fire depleted her ability to look after herself.

But the fire maintained its ferocity and veracity and continued to roar across the mountain in its quest for air whilst my grandmother ignored the flames licking at her skirt.

The flames subsided and the smell deceased but the smouldering bush marked the hill for ever.

As a child forever was tomorrow, today was endless and yesterday never happened so I indulged in ignorance. My grandmother was obviously stupid in trying to rescue something that she could not identify and never realised that her actions were grand but her motive lacked discretion.

The fire stopped at her boundary as though it had little point maintaining its rage and then retreated to seek a weaker foe.

Two :

Grandma was delighted and accepted the battle as a minor threat. She resumed authority over nature and ventured into the chicken pen shuffling through the smell whilst scattering feed to the chicks.

But Larry would not often agree and was determined to run faster than the chicks who swarmed around his paws as though all four were trees offering nesting comfort.

He poised afront the netted door to the chook pen and waited for the wave of furry balls on sticks then shuffled them into contingents beckoning for his nurture.

Chicks could only scamper but the resolute pecking  at his ankles by their mothers encouraged him to desist herding and lay down and enjoy the rumpling patter across his coat.

Larry was an Alsatian taller than a bush and as raggedly as a badly washed rug with an attitude to match.

The ground was not for him and he flew over the seven acres surveying all his unfenced territory always returning to nest comfortably on the porch watching me play.

He never needed to return home for food but only for love and the chicks and grandma and me.

He may have not been a dog but a whirlpool of tail and dust barely on the ground.

But he was always around pestering my feet and travelling off to follow his nose.

Until a snake slid over my desert booted feet whilst awaiting the bus to school stationary at the bottom of the drive. I was waiting to travel again, the repetitive journey to school was a chore and I waited for any opportunity to be small in attitude and magnamimous in heart.

The morning the snake poised on my boots he did not attack me, he could not leap, he wore no boots.

Movement for him was an endless wiggle through dirt that was no obstacle and my boots seemed to be a source of comfort for their warmth even in the heat of summer.

I needed to be early for the bus, it gave me time to decide if I should return uphill to the house and do nothing, there was no plan, things needed to happen, I was bored.

Often I walked to school rather than wait for serpents to slither around, walking was faster.

Forty minutes it seemed to take which seemed nearly half a day but my lunch sandwiches flapped at my hip and were cooled with air rather than the heater of the bus.

The journey was too quick, I had just awoken and needed to be at school hoping for a morsel of learning that was significant to a skinny kid in shorts, and I wondered what was required of me to be able to wear long pants.

I had legs and could walk in shorts or trousers and saw bigger taller people doing the same.

So I ignored school. I was there but learnt nothing.

School halls were a place of disorganised rushing and the cacophony of recently ensconsed tapping heels of proud shoes so diligently purchased on a budget of money by dutifull adults who seemed to own me.

I set  a challenge for myself of how to survive until the lunch break and not allow my honey sandwiches to crystalize. The only friend was reluctant to exchange food and I contributed my dough to the bin.

When school finished for the day I stayed out of the way watching the excited rush through the halls and the gathering of parents collecting their imprisioned tiny adults from a school cell and home to another style of supervised conduct.

Pacing the school grounds wasted time and I was tempted to climb the fence or simply walk through the gates to freedom but there was none outside and I would eventually need food and a bed so I waited. 

I waited alone amongst echoes and odours and the progress of the cleaners sanctifying the halls.

Even after their job was complete I still wandered the sterile vacant rooms, waiting and waiting.

No one rushed to extricate me, the gates and the fences were a boundary to be crossed but the world beyond school and grandma's house was too big.

Grown ups were big, rules were big, fences were big, other kids seemed big and secure in the knowing that their parents were big and would rescue them from this learning playground.

No one was there to rescue me so I walked the boundaries and paced the hall amused with the hollowness of the chamber aisles and the peace of empty classrooms still sticky with the carefully chosen words and sympathetic encouragement that learning would deliver a reward.

There was little reward, even my honey sandwiches could no longer be traded, most kids had worn out their relief that I would soon offer anything different.

I hoped but never begged that I would pop my lunchbox to reveal an exquisite feast that I could share in parts for other food that would nourish me after class closed and sustain my exploration of empty rooms, silent play grounds and odour ridden halls.

Waste bins became entertaining, desolate playgrounds were a source of peace and the trails of youngsters escaping to their homes and dodging enquiries of how much they had eaten from their meagre lunch box.

So much discarded as unuseful for any purpose other than a signal of rebellion against anything.

But I was too small to rebel, I was no longer scared of snakes, they zigzagged across my path but would not sliver uphill as I walked downhill, so I shuffeled my boots through the dusty paths on my way home.

Walking home after school was rewarding, there was nothing there waiting to comfort me.

Stepping cautiously I wanted to avoid snakes that would curl and rest on my shoes obliviously impeding progress and causing me to pause enough to make the sacred walk home a pleasure rather than a duty.

So I wandered the rambling narrow paths up and down and around the mountain at the foot of which nestled my comfortable existance.

The paths wound forever with no destination or beginning - they just were.

How many granmas had wiggled their way up and down and around and these paths, they were defined by the time it had taken to tread there. The paths led nowhere and began nowhere but were hallways through the bush leading past distant verandahs roofs and walls of beaten weathertorn refuges glimpsed within the camoflauge.

It must have taken many feet to gouge a path here and there, a path that I travelled not to things but past them.

The bush reeked of eucalyptus and dirt that encouraged me to inhale deeply the budding growth.

I was reluctant to use my nose at school. The halls reeked of children and shoes and sweaty clothes.

But there was a persistent unerasable smell of warm wet socks and body odour and merely a trace of the odourisers and wax used by the cleaners to eradicate the smell of children.

This was a daily ritual for me, to inhale the freshness of a new day and then feign disgust at the odour.

There were too many people at school and too few to maintain authority. 

When I could no longer trade my sandwiches I nested them convincing myself that I must never divulge my disgust to any adult. 

Adults were big tall puppets weilded by invisable strings, popping here and there, constantly interfering but eternally prepared to regulate their existance.

I could walk talk decide wonder think dream play lace my shoes pull on my shorts over my skinny legs eat sleep and genourously waste time whilst I waited patiently to grow up.

The blackboards were white with chalk, the bins were brimming with neglected sandwhiches and the halls littered with the innocent power of childhood.

There was no one waiting at home to greet me with hugs and food and I relished the moments of a dog larger than me leaping to greet me with no offering as thanks other than a happy shaggy hound bouncing me to the ground.

Larry owned by dog rules seven acres of land with a brick house of modest dimensions perched atop the slope of which the bushfire would not consume and never again threatened my meagre existance.

He pounced across the land as though on wings but could never remain airborne, his nose was bigger than his brain and it siphoned past presence as a history lesson for small nosed people.

And then he stopped loving and breathing and lay under a bush in the shade and journeyed to dog heaven.

Three :

Grandpa followed him to the grave, not with so little indignity but in a casket within a cemetery on the upper side of a hill. He had lay dead crumpled and cold, collapsed at the foot of the bathroom door wedged against the toilet bowl unable to pee and prone in death, blocking him from the persistent care from grandma. He had been missing for a few hours.

It was a sad way to die and grandma was so angry because she had to break the door down and lift him by his armpits into a more dignified position before the ambulance arrived and discretly shuffled his crumpled fame and then delivered him to a holding bay in the hospital and then to the dirt.

Grandpa had served time as an apprentice and was an accredited Tinsmith in his younger days.

In his older days he drove a taxi inbetween bouts of beer swilling and listening and betting on horse races. His radio was precious to him and he finally made enough money to buy a car - but only one with a radio. He regularly parked on the looping driveway and  often settled for an evening tuned in.

Grandpa was known as Pop which seemed fitting. He never uttered profanities and treated Larry and me as accessories to be nutured and guided, not instructed.

Pop was also an accessory to the town. Always ready with his taxi, always primed for conversation.

He was a habitual drinker and loved a natter and a smoke in the pub after a day driving and grandma and I often waited outside to collect him at the call for last beers and his notification from the barmaid to get out and go home.

Driving was good for him, he was an observer and travelled the suburbs helping fallen people to his cab and delivering them to their home comfort and the nuisance of a nagging wife.

When he returned home at the front of a dust plume whipped by his tyres he parked and let Larry roll around the car inside and out until he had licked the windows opaque.

Once home to his dog and grandma's hugs and the comfort of a crackling open fire he succumbed to the beauty of his radio.

It was a transistor radio fitted to his car as an optional accessory, but removable and quite suitable for use while in his lounge chair and tuned to the horse races. He followed by ear and the newspaper form.

We waited across the road and at six o'clock the doors of the drinking den were blocked open and patrons ushered out as though the building was spewing effervesence and Pop was delivered.

Within those hallowed walls stained with smoke and memories, rituals and laughter ran amock.

And Pop was a rolling drunk on wheels of beer and cigarettes and propped against the bar in his usual spot, happy that gran would be there to rescue him.

And she was and we did.

After last drinks were called the footpath outside the main doors became a whirling mill of men.

They spilled forth like a swarm of ants dismissed from the premise of the ruling queen.

Somewhere in the bustle he was and he suddenly presented himself as though he he was reborn.

That was why we called him Pop, he would suddenly appear.

Four :

Old Charlie was a hermit living in a shack he had built from anything available on his treed property and was proud to finally build an outhouse called a bog. His land even though unfenced maintained a boundary around his sanctuary and across the dirt track called a road with no name that dignified his anonymity.

The bog loitered in his yard festering a plague of flies that continualy buzzed around but would never land. There was gold in there but not compressed by nature. The gold squeezed from his bum the more he drank.

Larry stopped prancing for attention and ceased pawing at the ground mining for smells once they were no longer replenished. 

Charlie died alone guarded by his table littered with bottles empty as were the glasses and his heart.

He had drunk his existance until his god deserted him, but he surely had dug the greatest poo hole.

Walking worn dirt paths uphill outpacing snakes and hoping to find a window offering some relief.

Occupied with boredom I schooled and walked and taxied and persisted observing granma hauling water chopping wood feeding chicks entertaing Larry collecting a liquid ambulatron cooking food pumping water from the 60 foot depth of her artesian bore and touching her earth between between walking to neighbours with help with water company food and love.

The local council of neighbourhoods decided my granma was worthy of reward but they offered no money or mind. 

She was honoured with a plaque and a photo in the newspaper and a ribbon to be worn over her shoulder but carefully arranged to not amplify her breasts even though they had balanced her foot progress. She had smaller feet and her bosom prominently pushed aside the shoulder tall bushes impeding her progress.

Her duties to neighbours were not specified in writing but printed in the tracks she weaved through the bush. She carried water food and comfort for over two miles on weaving paths to others who struggled to survive without electricity, running water or gas. 

Granma was an inspiration, she seemed driven by a motor fueled with duty.

Peering from the windows I watched her pumping chopping carrying and trudging up and down the slope in her gumboots and floral dress.

And then before I was seven years of age and curious about the monotony of life, strangers appeared.

TBC


 

 

 

 







 

20250503

Thoughwaddy

 I was scared at school,

Masters and subjects did not rest well with me,

On leaving class I was overwhelmed with the magnificence of all I did not know.

I bathed within the glow of discovery.


Arithmetic and writing was considered a skill

Little did I recognise that none was better.

Nought did I realise that I was not me.

But a product of an accounting machine that required simplicity.

 

My education and indocrination cost someone money

But according to accounting discipline I was a negative

A ledger entry that weighed with more detriment than bonus

And numbered with little recourse for dispute.

 

Fat kids in the school yard had a belly and some dumb belief in compensating for their disability.

They were feared and revered for their magnosity.

Alas it was only their feeding and breathing that awed me

But I wondered where they would shit that great pile of food where it could not be smelt.


If I were ever smart enough to murder myself

The administrator would call me to account as an anomally in the statistics

Even after death I am in debt

I will pay even though I enjoy but I am reluctant to even wet my pants.

 

I am disabled enough to recognize my secrets and accept that

There are only three secrets :

Those you do not tell others, those you do not tell yourself

And the other is the secret.

 

Every man must go through hell to reach paradise

But I must resist the urge to strike him down

For he is merely an echo and strives to reduce my dignity

I am only a performer in a circus and he is the clown.

 

There are other reasons for failure and they are absolute traits of my animal.

Whatever happens you will react on purpose,

You will act according to your error of judgement,

And you will react out of remorse for your actions because you are stupid.


Being careful of yourself can lead to just being.

Judge a fellow man by the effect he has on his friends 

We are what we do not throw away, baggage weighs the soul

And when in torment and seeking revenge, remember to dig two graves.


The two most masculine words are 'generous breasts'

And god created man and tempted him with a demon and a choice

Favouring knowledge over wisdom he sealed his fate

By discovering the joys of the cunt that bore him.

 

When the days of creation were all done and twilight loomed

No one except nature had any further idea for one more thing

The growing sphere of nothing required a design team

To address the gap between a man's bag and his balls.


And god fills it with sperm as soft and glistening as a liquid pearl jam

But it is so wasted with a clenched fist and imagination.

So I walk with my dog and his nose

Following his smell of the past and I am lonely.


But he smells the past not the pain for it is a memory

He should not go there, memory is sufficient and it has a smell.

His hell is a life devoid of god, a random calvalcade of choices

The noise in the background of silence is the sound of screaming souls in hell.


But I take risks, it is my distinguisng trait of identity

What I do today paves the way to what I do tomorrow

And I remember being a one of millions of sperm squirming to survive

For what ?

 

When your heart breaks, my world does not hear but feels and keeps ringing

 And your thoughts are as useless as operating a health spa at Chernobyl

Dreams lead to thoughwaddy and cannot be redeemed but nutured

They will screech and then thump and then rattle.


My memory is an interptetation but not a fact

Alcoholics have more hair because they do not have time to worry

Trying to understand a naked woman is like taking apart a clock.

There are three types of woman and I do not know what they are.

 

Every civilization is founded on a crime

War is a trick of denial we perform when not wanting to die immediately

It may be that we should not speak

Unless we can improve silence.

 

So we seek solace with dissention but weighed with disability

Of the soul of the heart of the esssence,

But there is no one pedalling a one wheeled towards doom except me

And I follow a cycle of pumping bums full of uncatorizable sewerage.


But the animal I am insists on a cuddle

I cannot trust the cuddler but I feel better for the comfort

All |I have is esconsed in a package between my legs

But I revel with the belief that divorce from reality is the only trial that a finding of guilt sets me free.


We are what we feel not what we ought to say.


 

 

 

 


 




 



 



 

 



20250402

Penance

I have just killed someone, they were significant sitting on their toilet

but could not stand upright to wipe their arse

because i want to tell you of many failed attempts to smell my own shit

You may not mis them, you my not care but they have left a trail.

if you wish to pay into it - beware.

 

Carefully does it, but I was in a hurry and did not

swathing amongst hordes wandering a library who must not talk

Be angry at me like you are angry because of a slap on your bum

Hanging by your ankles from a nurses hand

how do I so wish your arse would bleed.


It is with regret that I bequith my legacy to an army of idiots

Is there none, they behave as a nought and will never be one

Sweeping the corridors of pacing dreams and daily nightmares

Dipping my swab in tainted genes

I feel the comfortable cunt nutured by my nemes.

 

And you, you are what ?


Dear Bono

Dear Bono your bug eyed glasses bug me

you seemed to be a champion of the Irish canvass

Sans pototoes and clovers and screaming catastrophe

When you were doing music so were inxs and remants of any band from the 70s

At least Yoko screamed animalality in tunnels but john climbed her ladder to see her cunt

A small man with hair atitude and a mean finger on his guitasr

Too young and searching for nirvana in the orient rather than feeling up a marharisma

Oh but the glasses were significant - furnished by the oriental abililty to blend rather than resist

There are too many of them (           ) !

There are too many of us - Malthaus may be onto something 

His weapons were not smallpox nor willing death but the agony of being unimportant

Bless him

And Bono preaches 'one world' behind the stampeed of his undersized shoes

He does nought 'cept ask us to give a hanshake and exchange bodily fluids to be one

...and his legacy is rebellion - success - sell out - insignificance - and slowly fade camera to scene

He is merely a puppet of the media and they have cut the strings

Could Bobby Geldoff possibly be the master here

(is this a connect with Paula Yates and Michael hanging from a door - an unhinged shared fuck).


.....................** to be continued**

! please observe that every word opinion judgement is carefully deliberatly appropiately scarolous.



 


 


20250111

FAT PEOPLE

Welcome to the Fatverse

There was a popular radio song by a not so popular musician in a previous decade regarding 'short people'.

Seemed funny at the time but the socially correct adjustments were not available at the time.

Where the fuck were the short people beside being extras in a movie about a girl who has no idea of where to go with a dog.

Such a simple girl who believes there is respect for innocent females in short skirts and a pair of bright shoes.

The poor girl walking on stilts thrusting her arse up and cunt forward.

And in the company of three persons of nondescript history who seem to find endless joy in escorting their delighted prey into a maelstrom of predators.

Oh yeah what a fantasy for dirty old men and stupid dogs.

There is no credit given to the dog, he only supports her journey and offers no protection.

As in most fairy tales it presents the girl as a vigin discovering the world of men.

At the time Judy Garland was almost 17 years of age but she needed to have those happy little puppy's

on her chest tapped down so as she would appear younger.

Damn it, she offers no resilience.

Is she just possibly a stupid woman.

The fucken book was written in 1900 - 2 generations before moving pictures recognised children.

But apparently there is a link between popular music and film !

How is Pink Floyd negotiating their legacy of synchronising their 40 odd minutes to the film.

Is difficult for me to gather enough paper to wipe my arse.

But there must have been an assembly to address what dubes they are.

Their soundtrack is short unless you start it at the beginning but not at any designated point.

Suffer if your believe.


And people are what they are - so fucken important and proud on their preaching perch.

They do not wear skirts. 

Hey babe i do not see how 2 bits of cloth is any protection.

That little flower you have is sooooooooo special -

Jeez I just wanna be the first person to fuck it.

 

There are things in the bible (and I refuse to give it any respect).

That encourage me to refrain from worshipping false idols.

Some language has been mutilated.

The only knowledge i gain from this is - do not masturbate.

 

It is quite gallant of me to protect virginity and yet espose sperm.

But I must pause in my rebuke.

I have no cunt and I'm pleased that I suffer no periodical pain.

I really feel for you females but you should present yourselves as proud rather than sex.

 

As a species you are a failure - you will not survive.

The only way you are going to change the world is masturbation.

You should not be a victim of scarlet shoe fantasies

Please sink your fingers into your juicy cunt and feel what i feel - which is zilch.

 

When you probe deep your fingers feel what your body feels - nothing.

But you know men want this but your mother told you to protect it.

And so the perpetual rythym of life continues.

(Darwin fucked up, no wonder his wife pissed him off for 20 years, shit, she was more bothered about his dick rather than his pen).

(As for Fat People, I needed a Title).

...... and do not concern yourself if you are not fat, you are not a media subject.